A Sweet Game of Scrabble
by Kame-tan
Summary: Crazy, one-shot challenge crackfic for bluedog10. Ed, Golden Trio, locked room, Truth or Dare, Scrabble, chocolate. Enough said.


Kame; this is for bluedog10 as a reward for being a loyal reviewer^^ I did my best...and failed T^T

A Sweet Game of Scrabble

"The door won't open!" Hermione panics after she tried the Alohoma spell.

"Here, let me try" Ed offers, approaching the door and clapping his hands. A blue light flashes, but nothing happens; the door remains solidly closed.

"Damnit…" Ed mutters.

"I want to get out before we miss dinner." Ron whines, rubbing his stomach. "I haven't eaten all day."

"Hey, let's go out the window!" Harry suggests.

"Y'know, that's a _great_ idea…too bad there aren't any damn windows!" Ed spats sarcastically.

"Look, calm down; if we get too worked up, we'll use up all of the oxygen in the room and suffocate." Hermione reasons.

"Great, I have to worry about starving to death _and_ suffocating." Ron moans.

"We need to think of a way to get out of here before we miss dinner." Harry says. "Any good suggestions?"

Silence echoes around the room as everyone tries to think of a solution.

"Damn, I can't think of anything!" Ed shouts in frustration. "I hope Al save me some dinner. Ron, your mom makes great stew."

"Yeah, I know." Ron responds airily. "No one's mom can rival her skills in the kitchen."

Ed raises his eyebrows. "Oh really? I'm pretty sure my mom was a better cook."

"I seriously doubt it." Ron dismisses.

"Oh yeah? What makes you think that, seeing as you never had any of her cooking?" Ed challenges.

"Guys-"Harry begins, but Hermione's epiphany cut him off.

"Al!" she shouts, "he's not down here! He can open the door!"

"No duh Hermione; I thought you were supposed to be a genius." Ed snorts. "This door locks from the inside; the only way to get out is if someone from the outside opens the door."

"So if you knew that before we came in here, why didn't you say anything!?" Harry says through clenched teeth.

"I just remembered." Ed responds sheepishly.

"So why did you do alchemy?" Ron asks.

"Cause it's cool, duh."

Ron groans, Hermione crosses her arms, and Harry rubs his forehead. Ed sits on a green box, fiddling with his gloves.

"What should we do now?" he asks dully.

"Well, what can three teenage boys and a girl do in a sealed room?" Harry wonders out loud.

"I know!" Ron shouts, eyes glinting maliciously. "We can play truth or dare!"

"That's stupid." Ed says, waving his hand dismissively.

"Why? Are you afraid?" Ron taunts.

"No; I figured from the malicious glint in your eyes that you would have me do something rated M." Ed responds.

"What?! You must be perverted to think I would suggest something like that?!" Ron scoffs.

"Actually, I figured the same thing." Harry admits.

"Whatever, the point is Ed is too chicken to play."

"What?! I'm not scared Damnit! You're on!" Ed steams.

Ron grins evilly. "Fine. I dare you to transmute your hand into something stupid and random."

Ed claps and transmutes his arm into a long, thin object, glaring at Ron the whole time.

"What is that supposed to be?" Ron stares. Ed whacks him on the arm with said long thin object.

"Oh, that hurts!"

"It's a TV antenna, stupid."

"Why did you choose a TV antenna, of all things?" Hermione puzzles.

"Because I can do this." Ed says lightly as he whacks Ron on the back of his legs.

"Bloody Hell!"

"Ron that was a stupid dare; Let me show you how it's done." Harry smirks. "Ed, I dare you to call yourself short."

"Hell no!" Ed fumes. "Wait a minute…it's supposed to be my turn!"

"Um, maybe we should try another game." Hermione says nervously. "How about Scrabble?"

The guys turn to look at her.

"Sure" Ed says.

"Ok" adds Harry.

"I guess." Ron mumbles, rubbing his arm. Hermione knocks Ed off of the green box he was sitting on and conjures a Scrabble board. Everyone reaches into a small pouch and pull out a letter. Once the order of the game is established, everyone pulls seven tiles and sits down to start. Harry goes first.

"My word is random" Harry places on the board.

"Nice word Harry, but I think my word is better." Hermione smirks, spelling out parasol.

"Crap, I had to get the stupid letters." Ron grumps as he spells out lamp.

"Prepared to be amazed." Ed announces arrogantly.

"What?! Is that even a word?" Harry questions.

"Hey, you can't make stuff up!" Ron shouts.

"It's not made up! Asinine is definitely a word!" Ed hollers. Both boys turn to Hermione.

"Is it a real word Hermione?" Ron rages.

"Um…I think so." She answers apprehensively.

"It's not could be, it is! Asinine is an adjective meaning senseless or stupid, or like an ass. I'll even use it in a sentence: The asinine expressions on Ron's asinine face prove his stupidity."

Before Ron can respond to the insult, a strange noise causes everyone to look at a corner of the room. Thick, brown, sludge-like material drips out of a hole in the ceiling.

"What is it?" Hermione asks with a nauseated expression. Ron sniffs the air and skips over to the brown stuff.

"It smells like…" he dips a finger in the stuff and tastes, "and taste like chocolate! Milk chocolate!"

"Disgusting crap." Ed mutters vehemently.

"You don't like chocolate?" Harry asks in astonishment.

"I won't eat anything made with milk."

"Then I dare you to eat chocolate!" Ron teases as he stuffs his face.

"Ron, we stopped playing Truth or Dare a long time ago." Hermione cuts in. "And I think we should be more worried about the chocolate. This room is sealed, so where is this chocolate going to go?"

"In our stomachs!" Ron says triumphantly.

"I agree; the only way to not drown in chocolate is to eat it." Harry agrees. Harry and Hermione join Ron in the corner to eat as much chocolate as possible while Ed kicks the Scrabble board off the green box and sits in the corner, watching.

"Hey, can't you guys eat any faster?" he complains as the chocolate rises to his knees. He stands on the box to avoid the dreaded milk product.

"It's not like you're helping!" Hermione snaps as she forces more into her mouth. Suddenly the door flies open and Al comes in.

"Hey, you guys are taking all day, what's going on?" he asks in a chipper voice as he steps into the goo. "I brought some water to help-"he slips and crashes into Ed standing on the box. Drenched in water and covered in chocolate, Ed does the only thing he's good at-he pouts.

"Man, this day sucks." He mumbles.

"We can escape!" Hermione screeches happily as she races to catch the door before it closes.

"I can eat real food!" Ron shouts right behind her. Just as Hermione reaches the doorknob, the door closes, once again locking them in the chocolate filled room.

"Great, now we can't get out until someone else opens the door." Ed seethes.

"Wait a minute. Why did we come down here in the first place?" Harry asks. "In fact, how did we even _get_ here?"

"Beats me." Ed shrugs indifferently as he makes a chocolate castle.

END^^


End file.
